When does the survival mode end?

I know every baby and every home situation is different, so there is no universal answer. But I'm currently in bed with my 4 week old (5 weeks on Tuesday) and he and I have been living here basically since we brought him home from the hospital. This room, this bed, is kind of it (I also live in the midwest and it's cold and dreary out so outdoor time is not readily available). I know I'm not the first to say it, but this feels very Groundhog Day-like.

I know the early days are not forever - he'll have longer wake windows, he'll start being responsive, etc. I just barely feel human right now, and sometimes the enormity of being his mother--his dependency on my body practically 24/7--overwhelms me. How will I ever be human again? We don't even do that much and yet, feeding, changing, burping, soothing, and getting this guy down to sleep takes up a whole day and then some. I do baby-wear sometimes but even then, the things I'm doing (dishes and his laundry) are more aspects of survival mode.

When did you start to feel human again? When did it stop being about survival and you began to DO things? Right now I don't even know how to be away from baby boy for more than an hour since we EBF on demand. I just feel so hazy about life and the future right now. I am trying to practice radical acceptance - that this is just our reality right now, but it won't always be. And I have good days and bad days. Today is just a bad one. I just wish I felt a little more human, a little more consistently.

ETA: as I’m feeding baby boy this early morning, pulling up Reddit, I’m so so touched by all the comments and replies here. Your input is affirming and gives me hope; and honestly so many of you provided a caring but essential reminder to me that I have some power here—to get outside, to change up our scenery, to be brave and get out with baby—and I needed those nudges and words of encouragement! Thank you to everyone who took some time to chime in here, truly.