Dark romance? Where do you draw the line?

I tend to “enjoy” darker themes. Mainly because I find light reading a little boring? I like situations that cause angst--I'm aa sucker for a tragic backstory and wounded main characters but I do like a happy ending ( if it makes sense for the story ) and I think angst can make the fluff so much more satisfying.

I always find it hard to find stories that are able to have the perfect balance that I’m craving between the dark and gritty and the drama and the soft ooey gooey fluff.

But my main problem is that whenever I try to look into these darker romance/taboo elements it’s always too much and not enough?

Like if I’m going to read a story with non-con and dub-con elements I still need the mmc to be redeemable? I need him to regret and hurt just as much? He needs to learn and grow. (That shit is irredeemable irl)

I think some darker romances are dark for the sake of being dark but almost gloss over and make it “okay” when really addressing the darkness and wrongness of the issue head on and working through it is actually the plot point that I’m looking for? Does that make sense?

And I just really struggle to find these stories where I just don’t immediately hate everything that’s going on and everyone dancing around the main issue?!

Do you get what I mean?

Maybe dark romance isn’t for me but light romance isn’t for me either. I can’t help the mental line in my head that gets crossed and I’m just disgusted and dissatisfied and disappointed with what’s going on—it might start off strong but goes in a direction I don’t want to see it go in. And then I get so bored with endless cutesy fluffy stuff.

Like where is your line when it comes to dark romance? How did you find it? Did you struggle to find the sweet spot that you were looking for in these kinds of books? Were you ever able to find the perfect story?

(obviously I’m open to recs if you have them, but mainly I want to see if people feel the same way as I do? And what the heck do you do about it?)