For 17 Years I Get The Same Advice

Since finding out I was bipolar as a teen I get the same advice from every therapist and even now trying ChatGPT “therapy”. But at the end of the day none of it makes me feel better or fixes my issues.

Has anyone with complex trauma done anything that works?

(Journaling doesn’t help, scheduling a time to worry doesn’t help, talking to “someone” doesn’t help, group therapy doesn’t make sense to me because I didn’t cause their issues so why am I in trouble and supposed to fix it?-I know that’s not the point but that’s the only point I get from it. I don’t know how to “find a moment of joy” because I haven’t been happy since I was a child. I don’t feel safe anywhere at home, at work, anywhere. I don’t have values etc. and none of those worksheets make sense to me because I’ve tried them). But when I try explaining all this I get met with eye rolls and sighs and threats to go inpatient.

I just want to feel like I matter and not constantly wish I was dead or didn’t exist…

Nothing makes me feel like I matter…