Searching for Meaning/Purpose

Hey Everyone, so been kinda feeling a little lost lately. Idk why am I doing a job that I dont like except the fact that I need the money to support my parents financially but lately I have been wondering what is the purpose of life. Kya yahi hai sab bus zindagi mein k subha uthey nokri per gaye...sara din aik kamre mein guzaar diya aur raat ko wapis ghar? Eat sleep repeat?

Those who have an ambition or a dream, how do you know what you want? Also how are you so sure that once you achieve it you will be satisfied with it and not feel hollow? Personally idk what I want except the constant urge to "Be Productive" and hustle to earn and improve my career, try and go abroad, and earn in dollars and send money home to help financially. Is that it? Am I missing the purpose or this is all there is to it?

I cant even start watching a series without constantly thinking about how I am wasting my time and that I could be doing better things and how these netflix series are there just to keep my mind occupied and rot my brain. Idk too much cynical ig.

I used to play games but lately I dont enjoy them anymore. I used to play futsal everyday for 8-10 yrs but i dont feel like going to play anymore. I used to sing and play guitar but I gave that up as well for religious reasons.

Why have things become so tasteless or have I lost the ability to savour the moment? I dont feel like marrying either because been through a bad relation that I get anxious and panic attacks. I dont feel attracted to the opposite gender like I used to. I used to look upto marriage as such a beautiful thing but lately i just view it as a contract between two adults who are bound to live together, reproduce and nurture the next generation to go live their lives. Also kinda afraid of the whole marriage and responsibility thing when I dont even know what I want in life... Kisi aur ki zindagi kyun khrab kere banda...

Anyways a lot of mixed chain of thoughts going around. Ig i just need a bit of direction.