Giving without getting

Hi. I have read a couple of books about spirituality and most of them recommend this practice of giving without expectations. I have been in a relationship for the last 10 years. I recently realised that part of my exhaustion in the relationship is because I give with the expectation of getting. This awareness also came with meditation. I can’t let go of the expectations. Instead of let going of the expectations i let go of the efforts. I start distancing myself when I don’t see him doing the things that I did for him. Is there anyway I can work on this? I have been meditating twice everyday and for some reason that makes me want to withdraw even more ( that feels selfish too). Is all of this a part of the process?